


Calex Drabbles

by ChameleonCircuit



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Angst, College AU, F/F, Fluff, Smut, calex - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-07
Updated: 2020-10-07
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:47:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 2,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26870884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChameleonCircuit/pseuds/ChameleonCircuit
Summary: A collection of Calex drabbles that were previously part of another drabble collection
Relationships: Alexandra Cabot/Casey Novak, Calex - Relationship
Comments: 8
Kudos: 23





	1. “How could you think this wouldn’t hurt me?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter tags: angst
> 
> http://sofuckingchuffed.tumblr.com/post/178212397797/how-could-you-think-this-wouldnt-hurt-me

Casey sat, trying desperately not to twist her hands in her lap, trying desperately not to show any outward signs of discomfort despite the nervous dread churning in her stomach.

She’d thought over a million things that could happen, a million ways her case could be derailed, a million things she might have somehow done wrong to lead her here.

But nothing could have prepared her for the way her heart leaped to her throat, threatening to suffocate her as Alex Cabot walked through the door.

She swallowed hard, opening her mouth to say something, but no words came. Her heart was beating loudly, painfully, her chest tightening as she tried to comprehend what was happening.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” Alex mused, hesitant smile on her face, and Casey’s vision clouded over with tears.

“How are you here?” She whispered, voice shaking. “I thought…you died. You—“ she broke off, covering her mouth.

“For what it’s worth, I’m sorry.” Alex sounded genuinely sorry, but somehow that only hurt more, and Casey’s chest grew tighter still.

“You’re sorry?” She spat, planning to continue, words unplanned and fueled by hurt and anger, but a sob took their place, tearing its way unexpectedly from her throat.

Familiar hands—Alex’s hands—were on her face immediately, drawing her close, foreheads pressed together, and Casey couldn’t help herself as she wrapped her arms around Alex, breathing her in.

“You smell different.” She laughed wetly, sniffing loudly as she tried to get herself under control. “Where have you been?”

“I had to go into hiding. New house, new identity.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Casey knew she sounded desperate and needy, but it felt like her heart was being healed and torn out again on repeat.

“I couldn’t,” Alex whispered, pressing a kiss to Casey’s forehead. “I wanted to, so badly, but I couldn’t.”

Casey nodded, sitting back a little so she could wipe her eyes, get a proper look at the woman she’d loved for so long, the woman she thought she’d lost.

“Did you think about me?”

“Of course,” Alex whispered fervently, gripping the back of Casey’s head with a sense of urgency. “Every day.”

Casey reached out to touch Alex’s face, allowing her fingers to trail across her features, feather-light and cautious. A small smile broke out on Alex’s lips, and Casey couldn’t help but match it.

“How could you do that to me?” She whispered, smile slipping just a little as she lowered her hand to Alex’s chest, covering her heart. “How could you think this wouldn’t hurt me?”

She knew it was unfair, knew Alex’s life would have been in danger if she hadn’t, but she couldn’t stop the questions from slipping out.

To her credit, Alex didn’t argue, didn’t try to defend herself. She just leaned in, pressing a soft, tender kiss to Casey’s lips before whispering, “I will spend every day making it up to you, if you will let me.”


	2. “I don’t understand how you can be that annoying and that adorable at the same time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter tags: college au, fluff
> 
> http://sofuckingchuffed.tumblr.com/post/178376795707/i-dont-understand-how-you-can-be-that-annoying

Casey flicked another piece of popcorn at Alex, stifling a laugh as she huffed in annoyance, likely unaware she’d even made the noise. She waited a moment before doing it again, and this time Alex threw her pen in retaliation, turning to watch as Casey squealed, ducking for cover, grabbing hold of a cushion to hide behind.

When Casey peeked over the cushion to look, Alex rolled her eyes. “I don’t understand how you can be that annoying and that adorable at the same time.”

Casey grinned, figuring she was in the clear, and tossed the pillow aside. “It’s ‘cause you love me.”

“Unfortunately,” Alex deadpanned, and Casey pretended to be offended.

“I’ll have you know, I bring a lot to this relationship.”

Alex peered at her over the rim of her glasses before huffing, picking her book back up, prepared to tune the world out once more.

“You should be studying,” Alex muttered, popping one of the stray pieces of popcorn into her mouth.

“I have been. I will be. But, Alex, I miss you.”

Alex visibly deflated at that, placing the book down to look at Casey. “I can’t afford to fail.”

“And you won’t. When have you ever failed at anything in your life?” Alex opened her mouth to speak, but Casey cut her off. “Sport doesn’t count.”

Alex closed her mouth, smirk forming on her lips. “That’s because I work hard.”

“I know. But one day won’t hurt.”

Alex sighed, reaching over to grab a handful of popcorn. “Fine. Two hours. Choose what you want to do wisely.”

Without missing a beat, Casey lunged forward, pressing a messy, passionate kiss to Alex’s lips.

“I have a few ideas.”


	3. “Wipe that smile off your face.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter tags: fluff
> 
> http://sofuckingchuffed.tumblr.com/post/178377702482/wipe-that-smile-off-your-face-calex

A frustrated groan tore its way from Alex’s throat and she slammed the book in front of her shut, running a hand through her hair as she sat back in her chair. **  
**

She turned to look at Casey, hoping she had something, anything to alleviate the frustration, the feeling of getting nowhere. But Casey was just smiling at her, eyes soft, and she felt her frustration bubble over into anger.

“Wipe that smile off your face,” she snapped, pushing her glasses up onto her head.

“Sorry,” Casey murmured, but the smile didn’t leave her face. “S’just, you’re cute when you’re angry.”

“Seriously? Not helpful.”

Casey shrugged, turning back to the book that was spread open in front of her, pen poised on her legal pad. Alex watched her for a moment, watched the way Casey bit her lip as she focussed, sticking her tongue between her teeth as she began writing furiously, and her anger and frustration subsided somewhat.

“How about we take a break,” she suggested softly.

“You? Taking a break?” Casey looked up with a grin. “Seriously?”

Alex rolled her eyes. “I could be persuaded, but you’re going about it all wrong.”

“You suggested it.”

Alex sighed, raking her fingers through her hair again, casting her glasses aside. After a beat, Casey moved across the lounge, so close their thighs were pressed together, and pressed a kiss to her cheek.

“What did you have in mind?” Casey pitched her voice low, finger trailing up Alex’s thigh, and all thoughts of coffee and cake flew out the window in favor of grabbing Casey’s face in her hands, kissing her hungrily.

“That work for you?” She asked breathlessly when they broke apart.

Casey swallowed, nodding as she rested her forehead against Alex’s. “Yeah. Yeah, that works for me,” she said before capturing Alex’s lips once more.


	4. “My heart hurts.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter tags: angst, Alex is not actually dead as per canon
> 
> http://sofuckingchuffed.tumblr.com/post/178448820657/my-heart-hurts-calex

Casey didn’t cry when they came and informed her that Alex was dead. It hadn’t felt real. She asked—no, demanded—to see the body, and was told that she couldn’t, that it was too late for that, and Casey’s mind simply refused to accept it without evidence.

Her bed had felt cold that night, empty, and that emptiness seemed to seep into her chest, filling her up, not allowing her to sleep.

This seemed to go on for days until the funeral came. Casey didn’t feel a need to mourn, had somehow still not accepted the fact that Alex was gone and was never coming back, but without the mourning, and without Alex by her side, she was stuck somewhere in between, numb, empty, cold.

The funeral was nice, the sun was bright, people around her cried, consoled her, but she couldn’t seem to shed a single tear, no matter how desperately she wished she could. Shame crept up inside of her then, knowing people must surely see her as cold and unfeeling.

It wasn’t until the offer came through from the DA, the offer for Alex’s old position, that something inside of her snapped.

She left the office without a word, heading straight for the cemetery, her heart pounding insistently, as though trying to crack itself against her ribs, and she thought perhaps that was exactly what was happening. It seemed fitting for her heart to literally shatter when it was already metaphorically broken.

She felt off-balance as she made her way to Alex’s grave, and the moment she stopped in front of the headstone her legs gave way, an unexpected sob tearing its way from her chest as hot tears fell from her eyes, when just seconds ago they had been completely dry.

She gasped for breath, clutching at her chest, wanting nothing more than to have Alex wrap her arms around her, hold her close, tell her that it was going to be alright. But wanting that just made it worse, and she felt sick, nausea swirling in her stomach as the acidic taste of bile hit the back of her tongue. She felt unhinged, completely broken in a way she thought she’d ought to have felt from the start.

Casey could almost imagine Alex telling her to pick herself up, dust herself off, and move on.

“You’ve had worse days than this,” Alex’s voice sung in her head, and she gasped out a wet sob.

“My heart hurts,” she moaned pathetically, pressing the heels of her palms into her eyes until little bursts of light danced around the darkness. “Everything hurts. It’s not fair.”

“When has life ever been fair?”

A laugh bubbled up inside of her, manic and loud, and she finally had enough sense to feel shame, though there was no one to witness her break down.

Casey took a few deep, calming breaths before wiping her eyes. She reached out to touch the headstone, shivering as her skin hit the icy marble.

“I love you, Alex Cabot. More than I could have ever put into words. I only hope you knew that.” She sniffed, lowering her head. “We’ll be together again. I know it.”


	5. "You crossed a line."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter tags: angst, lovers spat
> 
> http://sofuckingchuffed.tumblr.com/post/178540972932/you-crossed-a-line-calex

Casey stormed into her office, slamming the door behind her. Her skin crawled when she didn’t hear the anticipated bang, and instead had to endure the tap of heeled shoes across the floor until Alex stopped behind her. Even with her back turned, she could picture the way Alex was standing, arms folded across her chest, lips pursed while she waited for acknowledgment.

Casey chose not to give her the satisfaction, opting instead to move around to her desk, sitting down without looking up, for once grateful for her usual mess of papers scattered everywhere.

“Oh please,” Alex muttered, and Casey could hear the eye roll in her voice. “You’re behaving like a child.”

Casey felt the hairs on her arms prickle as fire coursed through her veins, rage filling her from head to toe. She bit her lip, fighting back everything she wanted to say, not wanting to give Alex the satisfaction of appearing in any way emotional.

“I was right and you know it,” Alex continued, the click of her heels bringing her so close Casey could smell her.

Alex’s shadow loomed over her, perfectly manicured fingers splaying across her desk, and she sucked in a sharp breath, finally looking up.

“I have a lot of work to do.” She gestured at the paperwork in front of her for emphasis. “You can show yourself out.”

Alex stood up straight, shock written in her features at being dismissed so easily. “Come on, Casey, you can’t—“

“I can,” she hissed, failing to keep a lid on her anger as she pushed back on her chair. “Get out.”

“Casey—“

“No,” she snapped, standing up, leaning over her own desk into Alex’s space, looking up at her through her lashes. “You crossed a line.”

Alex swallowed, taking a step back, and Casey felt a stab of satisfaction for finally having the upper hand in their relationship.

“I don’t know what you expected me to do,” Alex whispered, and Casey tried not to let the waver in her voice crumble her resolve.

“I expected you not to undermine me in front of a room full of men,” Casey hissed, standing up straight again. “I expected you to have my back, like I always have yours.”

Alex opened her mouth to speak, but Casey cut her off with a glare, swallowing hard on the rising lump in her throat, willing her voice not to betray just how hurt she felt.

“I expected you to be my partner, not my adversary. Clearly, I expected too much.”

Something bitter crossed Alex’s features, and Casey knew she’d landed her punch. “I’m sorry I don’t put you before the victims we try to help,” she spat before turning on her heel and leaving.

Casey listened to the tap of Alex’s shoes grow more and more distant until they failed completely, and she let out a shaky breath, sinking into her seat. As always, Alex landed the last punch. And, as always, Alex somehow held the moral high ground.


	6. "We could get arrested for this." (NSFW)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter tags: smut
> 
> http://sofuckingchuffed.tumblr.com/post/178818297137/we-could-get-arrested-for-this-calex

Casey honestly hadn’t planned to bring Alex down to the beach just to seduce her. The picnic blanket was to avoid the grainy texture of sand that, despite her love of the ocean, always made her skin crawl when exposed for too long. The bottle of champagne was for celebration, because, despite everything, they’d made it, and they were free to rent a villa for a week and ignore the rest of the world in favor of each other. And, well, the kiss was par for the course—kissing Alex was Casey’s favorite pastime, and she was quite certain Alex felt the same way.

But she hadn’t intended for this. She hadn’t anticipated Alex to kiss her hungrily, to hover above her, to press her into the blanket, lips insistent, hands roaming. She hadn’t expected the sudden surge of lust she felt feeling Alex’s breath hot on her neck.

When Alex slid a hand up her skirt she gasped, body arching as a heat spread up her neck, flushing her face, eyelids fluttering shut.

“Alex,” she whispered breathlessly, and Alex just hummed in response, mouthing at her neck.

Casey allowed herself to get lost in the sensation a moment longer, skin prickling as Alex’s fingers trailed along the edge of her underwear, right at the crease of her thigh. It was when Alex slipped beneath them that Casey was brought back to her senses, breath coming a little too short as she tried to sit up.

“Alex, stop. Stop.”

Alex lifted her head, removing her hand, fingers gently trailing down Casey’s thigh, calming this time, not seductive, as she frowned.

“What’s wrong?”

“We could get arrested for this.”

Casey bit her lip as Alex smirked at her. “There’s no one here.”

“But what if someone comes?”

Alex’s hand slid back up her thigh and she let out a soft gasp, letting her head fall back again, some of her resolve dissipating.

“Trust me,” Alex purred, hovering above her. “Someone _will_ come.”

Casey rolled her eyes, retort on the tip of her tongue, but Alex captured the words hungrily, hand slipping back inside her underwear, and Casey’s mind went blessedly blank.


	7. "You just broke the last bit of trust I had in you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter tags: fluff
> 
> http://sofuckingchuffed.tumblr.com/post/178899806272/you-just-broke-the-last-bit-of-trust-i-had-in

The moment Alex rose from the lounge, Casey perked up, on alert. She listened to the sound of the bathroom door closing before she reached out and grabbed the last slice of pizza, shoving half of it in her mouth in one go. She was still chewing the last little bit when the toilet flushed and Alex came back to the lounge room.

Casey trained her eyes on the TV, trying to inconspicuously wipe her greasy fingers on her jeans without Alex noticing.

It took a moment, and Casey didn’t avert her gaze from the TV at all, but Alex leaned forward before freezing beside her.

“How could you?”

Casey turned to look at her, frowning. “How could I what?”

Alex stared her down, and Casey felt sweat prickle at her brow, growing more uncomfortable by the second. There was a reason Alex was so good against perps, and suddenly, not for the first time, Casey was feeling the pressure.

“You just broke the last bit of trust I had in you,” Alex said, voice so serious Casey actually thought maybe she’d upset her.

But then Alex smirked, shoving Casey before resting back to place her feet in Casey’s lap.

“You owe me.”

“No. No, Alex, please. You know I hate feet.”

“Go on.” Alex wiggled her toes, causing Casey to cringe. “You eat my slice of pizza, you give me a foot massage.”

“If I’d known the stakes were so high I would have left it,” Casey grumbled, but she couldn’t quite manage to keep the scowl on her face as she took Alex’s foot in her hand.


End file.
